Sterling Performance

In touchy situations, people resort to calm, rational explanations, thinking that they are the essence of good communication.  All too often, though, this can get them just the opposite of what they want.

Here are a few examples of when explanations backfire and why:

• It makes angry people angrier I didn’t realize the project was late.  There were two different emails about the due date. One said Tuesday and the other said Friday.  Besides, I never got any numbers from marketing.

When someone is irritated with you, explaining that the whole thing is a misunderstanding, or worse yet someone else’s fault, is guaranteed to turn irritation into anger.   People who are already upset don’t care about your point of view.  They want you to care about theirs.   Understanding this is the actual essence of good communication.

In emotional situations, facts don’t matter. Explanations are heard as: If you listen closely you will see that I am RIGHT and you are WRONG.

Life offers a cruel choice: you can be right or happy, not both.  This is because most people would rather kill you than admit they are wrong.

Instead of arguing about technicalities, or trying to implicate others, ask: What would you like me to do? This will shift the discussion from who is to blame to who needs to do what to solve the problem.  In this discussion, it may come out that you have done everything you need to do, and that the guys in marketing are the ones who have to get off their backsides.

• Explaining can turn your no into a reluctant yes

When someone asks you to do something that you don’t want to do and you say no, the next question will likely be: Why not? If you answer that question, you will discover that the no has been forgotten, and the discussion is now about whether or not your reasons for refusing are valid.

Before you explain why you can’t do something, be sure that it is clear you are not going to do it.  If the other person persists in asking for reasons, either be vague or ask directly if the intention is to revise your goals and objectives.

• Explaining why you need something can prevent you from getting it

Since our daughter was born, we’ve had to move into a larger flat.  Our expenses have gone way up, but my salary is still the same.

Sometimes people are afraid to come out and ask for something because they think it’s too forward.  Instead they resort to a tactic that is far more objectionable — they explain why they need something, hoping the other person will take the hint and give it to them without their having to ask.

When you ask someone for something and get it, you incur an obligation to return the favour.  If you merely state your need, you are suggesting that it is up to the other person to give you your due, and perhaps that your due is a bit overdue.

Not only is there no obligation to return a favour, there is an implied rebuke for not acting quickly enough.

The lack of obligation and the rebuke are usually not intended, but they will be perceived just the same.  Needless to say, this approach does not supply the other person much motivation to help you.

If you want something, the best way to get it is to ask directly.

Next time you are in a tough situation at work and you feel the need to explain yourself, stop and think.  There may be a better way.

Dealing with bullying is a delicate affair, and there is probably no better example of how not to handle the issue than the ham-fisted behaviour displayed by the National Bullying Helpline and the office of the Prime Minister.

As soon as allegations of a bullying culture in No 10 Downing began to emerge in this weekend’s press, Gordon Brown’s lieutenants closed ranks and denied everything.

Whether or not the allegations had any basis, this behaviour smacks of heads buried in the sand. According to the Downing Street press office, the office of the Prime Minister has rigorous procedures to protect staff against bullying. That may be so, but to deny the existence of bullying outright and suggest there is no need for any investigation now that the issue is public is insensitive to staff who feel they are being bullied.

Lord Mandelson has confirmed the Prime Minister has a short temper, lending currency to tales of Brown grabbing staff by the lapels and taking his anger out on furniture and fax machines. In times of great stress, the temptation by managers to bully staff to get things done is much greater. And there’s a very thin line between the perception that someone is angry with themselves and the feeling that their anger is directed at you.

No 10’s imprudent denial that bullying could exist within its walls is matched by the National Bullying Helpline’s willingness to bring confidential enquiries into the public domain. The helpline’s CEO, Christine Pratt, has turned the issue into a political football — a decision that damages her credibility as a leader for such an organisation.

If it’s true that three or four enquiries to the helpline have come in from the 10 Downing phone line in recent years, why has Pratt chosen to blow the whistle right now? After accusing the government of not following procedure, isn’t she doing exactly the same thing?

Coming so close to the general election, this story isn’t going to go away, and No 10’s refusal to accept that bullying exists within it will only damage the present government’s chances of getting another term in office. To pretend bullying isn’t happening smacks of poor management, which, of course, is the most fertile ground for a bullying culture to take root.

The National Bullying Helpline will suffer for going public on this issue. The group has endangered the anonymity of people within the government who have gone to it for advice. It’s difficult to see how it can continue to reassure callers that their enquiries will be kept confidential now. It has handled the affair with just the indelicacy that it should be trying to prevent in other organisations.

Bullying is real. It happens every day, at every level of organisation. Only by dealing with it decisively, but with discretion, so that the victims of bullying are spared further suffering, can it be effectively weeded out of the culture.

• How to Handle a Workplace Bully
• Video: Calling a Bully a Bully

Nick Hine, partner at law firm Thomas Eggar, responds to your employment law questions:

For the last year, one of my team has been off on maternity leave. She was a capable worker who was missed at first, but we had a temporary replacement to fill the breach. My permanent employee is now planning to come back part time three days a week, which means I stand to lose some resources in the team.  Do I have to agree this?

– Name witheld.

An employee on return from maternity leave has a statutory right to request to work flexibly to help look after their child. 

It is not a right though, there is simply a statutory framework in place through which an eligible employee can request to work flexibly.

The request can be made by an adult to care for a child or another adult, but they must have at least 26 weeks continuous service and they should not have made a request to work flexibly in the past year.

The nature of this request could involve hours of work, when they arrive and leave and where they work.

Any eligible employee who wants to change their working conditions in these ways must make their request in writing. 

An employer must meet with the employee within 28 days of receiving the request to discuss the application and within 14 days after the date of that meeting write to the employee to either agree to the new proposed work pattern and set a start date, or to provide grounds for rejecting the application. 

If you reject the application then your employee has a right of appeal and must do so within 14 days of the original application being refused.

You must arrange an appeal meeting within 14 days of receiving that notice and then 14 days after that appeal meeting you must notify the employee of your decision.

There are effectively eight grounds for rejecting a request and these include:

• Burden of additional costs.
• Detrimental effect on ability to meet customer demand.
• Inability to re-organise work amongst existing staff.
• Inability to recruit additional staff.
• Detrimental impact on the employee’s quality of work.
• Detrimental impact on the employee’s performance.
• Insufficiency of work during the periods the employee proposes to work.
• Planned structural changes that would render the employee’s proposed pattern unworkable. 

If you refuse a request then your employee can make a complaint to an Employment Tribunal potentially for sex discrimination and also for constructive unfair dismissal if they resign as a result.

The Employment Tribunal would expect you to have properly considered the request and so if any employer refuses any application they must have a sound reason for doing so. This area is quite complex and I would suggest you take advice if these circumstances arise.

The business is in trouble. The finance director has bought some time from the creditors, and now you need to deliver a turnaround in the trading performance. Here are the five basic steps you need to follow.

1. Identity Check that everyone around the table is absolutely clear on what the business is about; “what you do” and, more importantly “what you don’t do”. A diversified or multi-segment business needs fast decisions on which parts have a future, and which would be better owned by someone else. The decision needs to be logical and simply explainable, to everyone in the business, so the ones that are staying know what the future holds. Move fast, move once, and move on. (more…)

Portsmouth University is one of a number of colleges kicking off an initiative to boost graduate recruitment amongst small and medium businesses (SMBs) in their area with a government funded internship subsidy.

Earlier this year, the Higher Education Funding Council for England (HEFCE) announced £13.6m for a graduate internship scheme designed to give new entrants a way into the job market and at the same time, provide support for local businesses by giving them access to educated interns for a limited time.

The scheme in Portsmouth has enough funding for 90 graduate internships. Employers will receive £1,200 towards the intern’s salary, provided they match that with a further £2,400. Internships have to last for at least 12 weeks. That’s a wage of around £8.50 per hour — more than the £5.80 per hour national minimum wage.

So far, 54 other colleges have received funding for between 20 and 700 placements in their area.

In total, just under 7,000 placements have been created, but there is still funding available for a further 1,500 internships to be created by colleges not yet applied to the scheme.

Although this won’t solve the problem of the chronic shortage of vacancies for the 22,000 graduates on Job Seekers Allowance, it will go some way to taking the heat off those who have just finished or are about to leave university.

Alice Hickman, recruitment manager at Purple Door Recruitment, the in-house recruitment agency at Portsmouth University explained how involved she was in the selection and ongoing development of the graduates she places. (more…)

In the spirit of the festival of love, here are some tips on kissing up to the boss, because there is no love finer than that which an employee feels for their boss.

Kissing up to the boss is a fine art that every ambitious employee needs to master. You never know when you might need to turn on the charm to either get yourself out of trouble or get picked for a choice assignment.

Good boss-kissers know that it’s a long-term strategy that builds the right relationship over time. You can’t go in all of a sudden and detonate a huge love-bomb. Bosses aren’t stupid.

Well, they aren’t that stupid.

Subtlety is the watchword. Bosses shouldn’t know they’ve been kissed - they should see it as the naturally occurring warmth and respect they deserve.

Here are some ideas:

• The best form of compliment is mimicry. Study your boss’s preferred style of dress and copy it. Don’t make a show of it. They’ll just get a feeling that you, like them, are meticulous and stylish. Start using phrases they use. Your boss will hear you speaking the same language and know that have a special understanding of what they want to achieve. (more…)